July 19th, 2024

Something scary happened today.

I work in private education, and most of students are in elementary or middle school. The building I work in has 15 floors, minus the basement floors.

I never really have time during work hours to go to the ground floor, and there aren’t any windows around my desk, so I can’t really know what’s going on outside.

I got a call from one of my student’s parents, and she sounded really concerned. She told me that there were police situated around the first floor. According to her, a man had a knife or some kind of weapon and was making a scene. She said she would come and pick up her child, and asked me to make sure no one was taking the stairs.

To be frank, it was confusing. Did they catch the man? Why did she mention just the stairs and not the elevator? I had a few questions, but I didn’t want to waste anytime.

Immediately I locked the doors, and made sure no one was getting in or out. There were a few students who had to leave, but I couldn’t let them. After locking the doors, I called the main office, to ask if the situation was over. I guess I was pretty nervous because I pressed the wrong extension number twice.

Anyway, after getting in touch with the security guard on the first floor, I asked if everything was okay, and if it would be safe for my fourth grade students to leave the building. To my surprise, he replied in a quite irritated voice, that everything was fine.

For a moment, I was stunned at his tone. I just wanted to keep my students safe. But it only took a moment to realize that maybe that his irritation was a good sign. If he had replied with panic in his voice, it could have meant the situation was worse.

I asked again, why there were police, and why a parent had called me with such troubling news. He told me that according to phone records it seemed like a kid had made a false report, and the police were doing a full inspection of the building.

I took my students to the first floor and watched them leave. Everything was going to be okay. But that’s when I started feeling scared.

I think the fear kicked in when I started asking myself “what if.”

What if the situation did happen, and there was indeed a violent man hiding somewhere in the building. What if I was the only person able to protect the students in my classroom. Would I be brave enough to do it? There are so many places I want to visit. What if I never get to see the waterholes of Kenya, or visit the beautiful lakes in Banff.

I already knew at that moment that I was safe, but the fear didn’t go away.

I had a similar situation happen last year.

I woke up around 6 AM to emergency alarms alerting people to evacuate. Usually, the emergency text messages said what the emergency was. For instance, it would say someone was missing, or it could be about extreme weather.This emergency alarm message only said to evacuate. My mind immediately went to North Korea.

I started frantically packing my cat in her cage, and packed some of her food. I couldn’t think of anything else I needed from my home. I just needed to call my family to make sure they were alright. Nothing else mattered to me in my house other than that.

Right when I was about to call my family, I got another official text message saying the previous messages were mistakenly sent. I felt relieved and angry at the same time. I felt like the government had played a practical joke on me. But then again, this situation was better than straight out war.

I think these scary and dangerous situations teach us, what really matters to us. It even taught me, who was important to me. In that stressful moment there were only a few people that crossed my mind.

It’s always so easy to get lost in daily routines and obligations. I lose track of why I’m going to work everyday. I forget what I want to do, because there is so much that I have to do.

I guess I need these extreme incidents to remind myself what’s important to me. I can only wish that I’ll become wiser to always keep in tune with what makes my life meaningful.

And, I think today’s little incident has pushed me into that wisdom just a little bit.